I’m Here, Friends!

Warm greetings to you friends. Welcome to my blog. I’m doing this for the first time. And I hope it will be something of value and interest to you. On this blog, I share what I do. I share things about my work, my passions and my publications. I want to use this opportunity to say a big thank you to everyone who supported me for my book launch and all those who show up for the program. Thanks so much. I’m so grateful.

I believe this project that I’ve been inspired to embark on will impact a lot of lives and bring more transformation and positive change to our society. I’m someone who is passionate about success and fulfillment. And I believe everything that we do should be geared towards this goal. And come to think of it, there is nothing that we do in this life that is more important that this, and because it’s the main reason why we are here. If all our achievements and activities on earth are not making us fulfilled, we will be unsatisfied and displeased with our lives.

So, today, I would just share few things. First, I want to make this blog post regular. So, every week I will be sharing something with you my friends. And please I encourage you to share with your family and friends. Let’s connect and grow together in love. I will really want this platform to be interactive. So, please feel free to tell me your opinions and ideas. Whether by direct message or as comment on this platform. And I will be glad to reply.

On another note, how has it been for you? Looking back at how the year has been, how have you been going through the year? Just before we know it, this year has been cut into half, and we will be waiting to finish the remaining half. They say time waits for no man. Nothing is truer than that. Our lives are been run on time and we must make sure we maximize it. 

So, I ask again, how has the year been so far? Have you been able to do things that you have in mind? Have you been able to achieve any of your goals that you planned for this year? What are your passions? What are your ambitions? Have you found them out yet? Someone said "If you don’t do something, something will do you." We can’t remain idle at any time. And our mind cannot remain empty. It will surely be filled with something. So, in order to be productive and maximize our time this year, we must see to it that we make good plans and work on executing them.

Your plan can start with something as simple as getting to know yourself. Maybe you want to give yourself more time this year and get to know who you really are. Not who people told you you are. But who you’ve really found yourself to be. Another thing is there is no how much we know ourselves that we cannot continue on that journey. We will always keep growing and knowing more about ourselves. 

So, out of all the bustling and hustling of this life, you still want to find time and get to know who you really are. And a simple way to do that will be giving yourself enough time. You want to have ME TIME. This is not for anything other than yourself. You just want to be quiet and be alone with yourself and by yourself. You can call it a meditation, a quiet time, or even a study or focus time. We are in a noisy world. And we must always find time to quiet our environment. Just create more time for yourself this year. And get to listen to your spirit. Get to know what the inner person in your spirit is saying to you. You will have direction and know what to do in life.

On this blog, I plan to share more things about life, purpose, vision, passion, goals, ambitions, career, lifestyle, health and everything in-between. Please stay tuned. And by the way, with my first book, I love to hear your comments about the book if you have read it. And if you’ve not, you can write me and I will send an autographed copy that I myself signed to you. The comments I’ve received about the book are so amazing. Time will not allow to mention all, but here are few of them.

“Connecting the Dots” is a simple, easy to read manual for making sense of your life, understanding your purpose and crafting a compelling vision to run with.” –Dr. Adeola Shabiyi Dolsh Consulting, Founder & Managing Consultant.

“Connecting the Dots is a great read for anyone who wants to make sense of their purpose, identify self-limiting beliefs holding them back, and to develop skills needed to confidently thrive in life.” - Emeka Nwarulor, Personal Growth Speaker, Author and Podcast Host of Growth Is Personal Podcast, Canada.

“This is the perfect book if fear is holding you back. It gives you courage not to give up and focus on what we want with passion and excitement. I believe with the right attitude, we are far more likely to succeed, and this book genuinely helps change the readers mindset about life. Easy to read and actually enjoyable.” – Purity Wanjiku, Certified PSM1, SAFe5 Agilist. Kansas, USA.

“’Connecting the Dots’ is a book written with great dexterity. Its approach is very down to earth and practical for easy life application. I love it and recommend it for everyone who seeks to self -develop. Thank you.” – Ajike Omolola George (Fight Good Fight of Faith with Lola) Paris, France.

“This book is a unique compass that will not only help you connect different milestones of your life, but will also help analyze your life journeys, grant you superior discernment of your historical steps whilst guiding you seamlessly on making the rest of the journey in the direction of your purpose through empirical parallels. I recommend this book to all.” – Olumide Awobowale, Pastor Integrity of the Word Ministry, London, UK

And more are still coming. I will love to hear yours as well! 

Please, share this blog link with family and friends. I’m grateful. Thank you for your time.

Discovering Your Purpose

Let’s discuss one of the most important subjects– purpose. I know a lot has been said concerning this subject and perhaps you might have heard it a million times. So, the subject is not new. But perhaps I will show a new approach to it in this chapter. No matter how we put it, the subject of purpose is one that needs to be understood. Why because, that is what the entire life is all about. If there is no purpose for our existence, we have nothing doing here. People who have discovered their purpose and are living it are the ones living a true life. People who have not are just about to find their own life. Perhaps, it’s other lives they are living.

In this chapter, we will look extensively into this subject of purpose and we will discuss how it can be discovered, understood, and lived. Like Robert Byrne once said, "the purpose of life is the life of purpose." Yes, those two powerful phrases are very important – the purpose of life and the life of purpose. When we understand the purpose of life, we will understand why it must be lived purposefully. And that is where joy and fulfillment come from.

For anyone who is looking for a lasting happiness, this is the secret. This is where happiness lies. When you continually live only for the reason why you are created and brought to this earth. Then you are the happiest person on this earth. There is no need dillydallying or giving false hope about having lots of achievements without fulfillment. Regardless of the number of your possessions, if there is no fulfillment, it is a big waste of life. Your life is only meaningful when it’s being fulfilled.

How do you discover your Purpose?

If you dont know what to spend your life with, or Not sure what your dream is, then follow the PATH

P -- PASSIONS(follow your interest)

A -- ABILITIES (UNIQUE)(spend more time in your unique abilities)

T -- TENACITY(What don’t you give up on ? Pay attention to that)

H -- HELPFULNESS(Be more service oriented towards family, relationships, community and people around you

All we need to be successful in life and act on that potential is to simply know how to get started, remain consistent, and pursue success with  a purpose at heart.

Whether you believe it or not, at this very moment, you have the potential and ability to accomplish extraordinary things in your lifetime.

GO and work out your success today !

Adeola Atekoja,

Author. Transformational Mindset Coach,

Self Discovery Expert and a Public Speaker.. 

https://adeolaatekoja.com/book

Book Reviews - Connecting the Dots

 

"Are you tired of feeling unfulfilled in your personal and professional life? Do you often find yourself searching for something more, or living in the fear of your past or future? You are not alone.

According to a recent statistics, 2 out of 3 people are living in fear. And more than 75% of people are unsatisfied with their jobs.

In order to solve this age-long problems, that’s why I have decided to put together my FIRST NEW BOOK titled CONNECTING THE DOTS. I spent a whole lifetime learning from my personal experiences and having over 5 years of research into studying people and working with them to understand these challenges. I promise you that this book will deliver to you solutions, ideas, and direction.

You will find secrets, hacks and strategies that will give you a head start into dissolving your fears and uncertainties, and guarantee your success and freedom.

This book is not just a theory. It is a blueprint – a material that will give you a direction and guide. Don’t just believe my words for it, hear what other people are saying about the book;

“This book is a unique compass that will not only help you connect different milestones of your life, but will also help analyze your life journeys, grant you superior discernment of your historical steps whilst guiding you seamlessly on making the rest of the journey in the direction of your purpose through empirical parallels. I recommend this book to all.” – Olumide Awobowale, Pastor Integrity of the Word Ministry, London, UK

“Connecting the Dots” is a simple, easy to read manual for making sense of your life, understanding your purpose and crafting a compelling vision to run with. The supporting stories are relevant to everyday life and resonate. The author, Adeola has dedicated her life to helping people discover their purpose as well as bring it to reality. This book is a recommended reading for anyone who is in the ‘gray area’ of their life, seeking clarity on their life’s purpose and how to execute against it.” – Dr. Adeola Shabiyi Dolsh Consulting, Founder & Managing Consultant.

“This is the perfect book if fear is holding you back. It gives you courage not to give up and focus on what we want with passion and excitement. I believe with the right attitude, we are far more likely to succeed, and this book genuinely helps change the readers mindset about life. Easy to read and actually enjoyable.” – Purity Wanjiku, Certified PSM1,SAFe5 Agilist. Kansas, USA.

“Connecting the Dots is a great read for anyone who wants to make sense of their purpose, identify self-limiting beliefs holding them back, and to develop skills needed to confidently thrive in life.” - Emeka Nwarulor, Personal Growth Speaker, Author and Podcast Host of Growth Is Personal Podcast, Canada.

“I would like to salute you for the great thoughts you have put together to affect the mindset of this generation for good. Every single message you shared resonate with me. I believe every reader of the book will truly be blessed. You have done a great Connecting the Dots work, my sister. I appreciate you for putting in your best in this book.” – Sincerely, Adeola Adeniyi, Finance Director of International Students for Christ in United States.

“As one reads "Connecting the Dots," the sense of passion and hunger for the conceptualization and actualization of positive possibilities in the lives of its readers, cannot but be seen in the author. It is a book that can compel those needing it to embrace the Change Imperative, and commit to the prize for the prize. I recommend it, and encourage that there be a pen and notepad as one reads. Big "well done" and great "kudos" to the author!” – Tolu Omodara, Policy & Strategy Lead, Armourgate Communications Consult. Pennsylvania USA.

“What comes to your mind when you hear architectural masterpieces? It describes a work by a master craftsman made Connecting the Dots specifically to demonstrate mastery or excellence. Regardless of the scale, every such masterpiece is premised on precise link of various points of a draft. It can only be turned to a masterpiece when the strategic points are appropriately aligned. That is exactly why this book is recommended. It’s filled with allusions of the Creator’s connections of your good, bad and ugly experiences, weaved into emerging excellence that meets the Definition of Done of your life’s purpose.” – Arch. Funke Ajayi, Virginia, USA.

“It’s okay for the blind to lead the blind, we can always understand one is trying to help the other, but it’s a tragedy if the blind begins to lead people with 20/20 vision. That is what seeking direction from wrong sources, humanistic philosophies and the likes, seems to me. But this book is a delight, a thorough, researched and practical pathfinder for whoever desires a safe trip towards purpose fulfillment. Happy reading.” – Adebule Atekoja Lagos, Nigeria.

“Connecting the Dots’ is a book written with great dexterity. Its approach is very down to earth and practical for easy life application. I love it and recommend it for everyone who seeks to Connecting the Dots self -develop. Thank you.” – Ajike Omolola George (Fight Good Fight of Faith with Lola) Paris, France.

“Connecting the dots is a fascinating and inspiring book. The stories inside are genuine and impressive. The author shed light on how to make best of your beginnings, maximize your present and create your future. It is a ‘must read’ for anyone who wants a greater life for themselves.” – Kayode Onayemi, New York, USA.

And many more people have testified about the book. The praises are enormous. I want to hear yours as well. Go now to this link …. and get a copy for yourself. Or write to me and I will personally send you an autographed copy with my signature. Talk to you soon.

https://connectingthedots23.blogspot.com/2023/03/connecting-dots-book-cover-designs.html

Connecting the Dots Book Cover Designs

 

Overcoming Different Types of Fears

I don’t know how many times I’ve heard negative things about fear. Like I alluded in the previous chapter, most people believe fear is a bad thing and that’s why they try to avoid it. But fear is a good thing. In fact, if used well, could be the best thing that could ever happen to you. Fear doesn’t only give you signs of what you should do, it gives you enough drive or push to do it.

What we are afraid of, most times are what will improve us or make us better. But because of the usual dogma that we’re used to about fear, we try to avoid it by all means, and worse still, ignore it and pretend like it’s not there, while we are supposed to take full advantage of it.

Fear has brought some people to their place of fulfillment. While it has also brought some people to a place of disappointment, when they don’t take the right action. Fear is what none of us can avoid. Even to the people who are highly successful and courageous. They would tell you that they also experience fear. Nobody can eliminate it. But we can always overcome it. And this is demonstrated in how we approach it. The kind of relationship that we have with fear is what determines the kind of result that we get from it. While some people have turned their fear to a blessing, some other people have turned theirs to a nightmare.

I’ve had different occasions in my life when I’ve turned my fears into blessings. There’s one of them I would love to share with you. My mom gave birth to me at a tender age outside wedlock. She told me of how she went through the ordeal and suffered deep emotional pains.

As, she wasn’t prepared to have a baby, she had to struggle and pull it through to breastfeed and groom me up so that I now become who I am today. While she shared that story, tears welled up in my eyes and I felt her pains. This is a story that I will never forget in my life.

As I began to grow and became an adult, the fear of what my mother went through began to grip me and I was always reminded of how much pain and agony she went through. This fear helped me to protect myself against any of such similar occurrence that may want to repeat itself in my own life. I guarded myself and avoided anything that could lead to such. Eventually, I ended up getting married as a virgin. I had avoided what my mother suffered because of fear. I used the fear to protect myself and let it keep reminding me of the dangers of falling into any relationship or situation that could ensue into such an incident.

Perhaps, there’s a situation or occurrence in your life that you’ve used fear to help you protect yourself and avoid danger or allow you to take the right action that you could have felt reluctant if there was no fear. This is a good way to connect the dots on fear and make use of the experience you have. Fear is a good thing on its own. And it has the energy to drive us into action. So, we can do what we feel we’re unable to do when it comes.

Types of Fears

There are many types of fears depending on the situations and what individuals are going through. But for the sake of this context, let’s discuss seven types of fear. They are –

1. The fear of the unknown,

2. The fear of failure,

3. The fear of poverty,

4. The fear of rejection,

5. The fear of death,

6. The fear of public speaking, and

7. The fear of success.

...to be continued!

Excerpt from Connecting the dots 

Overcoming the Force of Inertia

 

Just before we proceed into other important discussions, let’s look at something very critical. It is the force of inertia. In our life journeys, as we try to make sense of what we go through and make them beneficial to us, we face certain stumbling blocks that challenge our progress. These stumbling blocks, among other things, blur our vision as we tend to see only the negative side of things, dull our hearings and make us hear only fearful tales that send shivers down our spines, and develop cold feet, all in a bid to pull us back from achieving our goals.  I have put all these obstacles or stumbling blocks together as one. I call them the force of inertia.

In this chapter, we will discuss this force and how to overcome it. But first, let’s understand what it is. We learn this force in Physics. If you study science, you might have probably come across it. It is a force common to all objects that remain at rest. Objects don’t display this force except there is an attempt to alter their state; at which point it is called resistance. In other words, the force of inertia only acts when you are ready to push a resting object into motion. If you like to keep things at the status quo, the force of inertia won’t bother you. There’s no problem; no disturbance. But the moment you are ready to make a change, then be really ready for some resistance, which is this force of inertia that would be acting against all the efforts that you would be making to bring about positive change in your life.

All of us grew from different environments and background. We’ve had different experiences and exposures about life. All these have contributed to our beliefs, opinions and ideas. And many things that we do today are hinged on these factors. We talk, act, and react because of these things.

If some of these beliefs and ideas that we have developed over the years are not good, we may have a challenge changing them because it is not always easy changing things, especially with us, human beings. And if we find it difficult connecting the dots, then, it’s even harder. From our lifestyle to our habits and things that we’re already used to in our comfort zones, we find them difficult to change.

But why is this so? Why is it difficult for we human beings to change? There are several reasons for that. First, it is because of our nature. Human nature is designed in such a way that it resists change. This resistance to change in the environment by our body is what we call homeostasis. We can also say it is the maintenance of the internal environment, despite changes in the external environment. Human body regulates itself and puts all the physiologic factors in a relatively narrow range despite constant change in the environment.

For instance, there is always constant change in external temperature, but the body temperature is maintained within a narrow range. Also, there is constant change in pH and oxygen level in the external air, but there is a relatively constant level of these factors in the blood. So, the body keeps resisting the change despite what is happening on the outside. So, this quality is also expressed in human behavior. Humans resist change in their environment. They resist change in their job. They resist change in their habits. And part of this, is also the fact that the human brain is designed to resist change. It avoids anything that changes the status quo and increases the tendency for survival. So, the brain uses this change resistance to increase human survival and avoid threats or danger.

The second reason why change is difficult is because force is required. For every change that is made, force is required. Newton’s first law of motion made us understand this. It states that an object will remain in a state of rest or at motion unless it’s being acted upon by an external force. So, that means it’s only force that can bring change. And it doesn’t matter if the change is positive or negative. Negative change easily happens because there are many negative forces in the world. But positive change hardly happens because there are not so many positive forces in the world. So, to make a positive change, you’ve got to be intentional about it, and apply the right force. We’ll still discuss more on that later in this book. The force that is required varies depending on the kind of change you want to make.

The third reason why change is difficult is because, most times, it brings discomfort. Have you ever been in a situation where change happened to you and you felt so uncomfortable or inconvenient? It is because change itself is always associated with discomfort or pain. There is something your body is already used to, if there is a change, it would feel it and most times, reject it.

For example, if your boss called you and asked you to change your location of job. Maybe where you were working before was nearer to your house, but the new place is farther. Most likely you would not like the change, unless more money is added to your salary. And probably with that, you might still prefer where you were working before, given that you are already used to it. So, making a change is not always easy to do.

And as a matter of fact, the first thing human brain thinks of whenever a change is mentioned is the discomfort or pain associated with it. So, you won’t think of the benefits first. The first thing you would think of is the negative, which is quite understandable.

The fourth reason why change is difficult is because the result of positives is mostly not immediate. If you make a positive change in your life, maybe you change your habit, to see the effect of the change, you may need to wait for a while. That is unlike negative change that is mostly immediate. If you are going to the gym and you are working on your body weight and burning excess fat, the change that you have made to your lifestyle might not produce immediate results, but it’ll surely come.

The problem however, is that a lot of people want the result to be now. They want immediate gratification. So, if that is not happening, they are not willing to make the change, and it becomes difficult for them to do. So, every change requires time to come to effect and produce results. And depending on the kind of change, that also determines how much time would be needed to see the results.

The fifth reason why change is difficult is because there is need for sacrifice. There would be many things required to make a change before it happens, especially in the case of positive change. Again, if you want to change your lifestyle and start going to the gym, apart from the internal force of decision that you apply to force yourself and go to the place, you also have to invest your time and money. Even if what you are given is free, you still have to sacrifice other things. Change doesn’t happen alone. It happens with many other things. So, while thinking of making a positive change in your life, you have to also think of all the resources you have to put in place before that change can happen.

Introduction to Connecting the Dots

This book, connecting the dots – how to make sense of your life, purpose and vision is an exquisite material for great minds. The title was rather spontaneous. I was having a conversation with someone, and it just came. Hearing the title, myself, it didn’t make sense at first, because I had already drafted many supposed titles, I thought I would use. But when I mulled over it, I knew that was it! And when I thought about the impact the book would have on people’s lives, I wouldn’t hesitate to get the knowledge and ideas across.

This book – connecting the dots would help you realize a lot of things that weren’t making sense to you in your life before. You will get insights and understanding of what is going on in your life. Maybe you’ve been going through life, and you’ve been wondering what exactly is going on. Or maybe it has been difficult for you to live life and enjoy it on your own terms, this book will give you ideas on how to answer those questions.

You will find secrets that are not hidden, though many people don’t see them. You will begin to realize that you’ve got so many more treasures than you’ve ever known, that you have potentials and abilities that are yet to be unleashed, and many things that you thought you could not do before will become way easier for you, thanks to the shift in your mind. And by the time you are done with this book, your perspectives and orientation would have also changed vis-à-vis your life, purpose and vision. You will realize that though you went through difficulties and turbulent times, they were meant to make you stronger and better in achieving your goals and attaining a new height of success.

I came from a humble background. My family was poor. And though I grew up in that poor environment, my mind was not poor. I was always interested in things that enrich the mind and add value to people. While I was growing up, I had different challenges. But those challenges have helped me to become who I am today. They have shaped me to have better orientation about life and people.

Connecting the dots for me would be how those things I’ve gone through in life have made sense to me; how the difficulties and challenges I’ve been through have made me to be a better and stronger person I am today. And how I’ve gained more from life and people.

Connecting the dots for me would also mean appreciating where I am today. I remember March this year when I was a special guest at the Capitol Hill building Washington DC, seated side by side with 20 great women of excellence, who were honored for their service to the State at the Annual International Women’s Day Celebration. This invitation was huge for me because the invitation came from the least expected quarter. No member of my family has gotten such invitation. And even as I look forward to where I’m going, it is a great reassurance of what is possible, valuing what I have, while I work towards what I want.

Connecting the dots is a book that I believe strongly would open your eyes to fresh ideas. It would make you understand – how to break free from every limiting belief and impostor syndrome that are holding you back and hindering your progress, how to deal with all forms of fears and uncertainties, how to make positive change in your life against all odds, how to set goals and achieve them, how to convert all your weaknesses into strengths and make the best of what you have, how to discover your purpose and fulfill it, how to convert your problems and delays into progress and solutions, and how to have a long-lasting happiness and fulfillment in life.

This book is packed with tremendous ideas. I promise you it will worth your time, and you will come back with great results.

So, sit back and relax, and enjoy the read. I see a BOLD NEW YOU on the RISE. Cheers!

With love,

 

Adeola Atekoja

Maryland, United States

January, 2023